What's Been on My Mind

Pajjar and I have been talking a lot about money and budgeting recently and it’s been awesome! Some of the blogs, books, sermons, and conversations we’ve been involved with have really been motivating us.

I went through our last three months worth of bank statements and categorized everything we spent on to see where our money has been going. I’ve always considered Pajjar and myself to be frugal with our spending, and compared to a lot of people, we are, but doing this just totally opened our eyes on how much better we could be.

This month is the first month that I've ever budgeted for in my entire life. Scary but true! I've done quick budgets before to see if we have enough money to make a big purchase, but that's not a real budget. I'm talking about a real budget, one where every dollar is assigned a duty even before we get paid. I’m also talking about the commitment to sticking to it as well! We’re budgeting and we’re going to give it our all!

I spent over $400 in "Fun Money" in June (partly because of the guy's road trip to IL) and over $200 in one weekend at the Source's Free Comic Book Day back in May! "Fun Money" is money that we budget for our hobbies and for fun. Pajjar has her own "Fun Money" fund and I have my own as well. We can spend this money on anything we want, no questions asked, unless it's something that's illegal or damaging to our faith, friends, family, job, future, and/or spouse. Duh! If I wanted to spend it all on Magic cards and CDs, then that's perfectly fine! If Pajjar wanted to spend it all on coffee and shoes, that’s fine! We’ve already decided how much both of us can spend on our “Fun” stuff. Part of the fun with making money is spending it; just remember that spending money is only part of the fun of making & having money, not all of it.

The other fun things to do with money are to save it and to give it away. Unfortunately, in this Western culture that we live it, we prefer to spend it first, then save the rest, and give none of it away. The way we spend our money is completely backwards. We spend, save, then give, while we should be giving, then saving, and then spending.

Snoop reading an Andy Stanley book.

“You don’t miss money that you give away. You don’t miss money that you spend on the essentials. But you miss the money that you foolishly spend on the items that you don’t need.” - Paraphrase from an Andy Stanley (of North Point) sermon.

It’s so true, I don’t miss money that I tithe, or donate to help a child through Compassion, or to help organizations that help others, or to celebrate someone’s birthday. I don’t miss money that I spend on groceries or for a roof over my head or the essential clothes on my back. I miss the money that I spend on things that I want and foolishly buy. Things like shoes that I rarely wear, or a DVD that I’ve only watched once, or a set of golf clubs that just sit in my garage, or that foot-long sandwich that I didn’t finish and threw away. I miss the money that I misspend. I’m angry and disappointed at myself in those moments. I’m never upset with myself when I give a child a birthday card with a $20 bill in it, I’m never upset with myself when my family is enjoying dinner with the groceries that I’ve bought, only when I misspend my money do I feel like a fool.

Give, save, spend, NOT spend, save, give.

“Even if you were wealthy, you will hit a moment where spending won’t be fun anymore because you’ll have everything you want to buy and saving money won’t be fun either because you already have enough saved for the future. But no matter how much or how little money you have, giving money will always be fun.” - Paraphrase from Dave Johnson (of Church of the Open Door) sermon.

Money reflects and magnifies a person's character. Character is who you really are; it's who you are when you're alone. You could be a great guy in public and at work. Everyone who knows you says that you’re a great guy! But at home you beat your wife and watch a lot of pornography. If these people really knew who you were at home, they would not say that you are a person of good character. Character is who you really are, it’s who you are when you’re given the opportunity to be alone and do things in secret that you can hide from others, and money only magnifies your character.

If you were genuinely a kind, giving person before you gained/lost money. Chances are you will continue to be a genuinely kind, giving person no matter how rich or poor you are. If you were a nice person in public and at work, but always envied what you didn’t have and misspent your money, chances are, after you’ve gained/lost money, you will continue to be envious and jealous, no matter how rich or poor you are.

“I’ve met people who were mean, selfish people before they became Christians, and after they became Christians, they were still mean and selfish. I’ve met people who were mean and selfish before they became Buddhist, and after they became Buddhist, they were mean and selfish people.” - Paraphrase from an Erwin McManus (Pastor of Mosaic) sermon

Religion, money, getting accepted into a school, the act of marriage, having a child, landing a job, getting a promotion normally does not change a person’s character instantly. People think life changing events will instantly change a person, but we all know that most of these people don’t all of the sudden flip a switch and change who they really are or how they think.

It’s not the event that changes a person’s life, it’s the process that does. It’s not so much becoming a Christian that so much changes your life; it’s the past 10 years of trying to be more Christ-like on a daily basis that truly changes your character. It’s not the wedding ceremony that changes your character, it’s the dedication of “for better or for worse” for 10 years that changes character. The life-changing event is celebrated, while it’s the process that truly changes who you really are.

“I don’t care as much if my daughter is the smartest kid in her school. I care more important about how my daughter is going to deal and react when she realizes when she isn’t.” - Paraphrase from a Stepan Van Voorst (Worship Pastor of Church of the Open Door) sermon.

It’s the process that matters, because the process is what forges character. Society values results more than the process. Results orientated thinking is important, as long as it’s not as important as the growth, knowledge, & wisdom learned from the process.